


muddle through somehow

by temerity (forsanethaec)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Babies, Birthday, Christmas, Domestic, Fluff, Future Fic, Kid Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-25
Updated: 2012-12-25
Packaged: 2017-11-22 08:22:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/607788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forsanethaec/pseuds/temerity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis and Niall's first four Christmases with their daughter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	muddle through somehow

**Author's Note:**

> Basically 'a great husband and dad' and why is there no kidfic for this pairing and then this. Pretty sure writing it gave me SEVERAL cavities. Unbeta'd and I had a few glasses of wine with Christmas dinner so idek. Big ups to Lucy and Shannon for enabling and brainstorming. Merry Christmas, internet!

(three years)

They pick Ellie up together from nursery school two days before Christmas. It's not her first but it feels like it, because it's the first year she's old enough to understand what's going on. She's excited, of course, chatters on in her half-intelligible little voice from the backseat about candy canes and what they learned about Hanukkah at school today. Louis is twisted around in the front seat as Niall drives, nodding attentively. 

"You know, I’d say she takes her Christmas spirit after me," Louis says to Niall, who's half-listening, twiddling the iPod dial to try and find their favorite song on Ellie's Christmas album, which Louis thinks privately that Niall probably likes the best of any of them. "But I think she's more excited for cookies than presents, so, suppose that'd be you." 

"That’s my girl," Niall says, grinning at Ellie in the rearview. She giggles. 

"Play ‘Santa Baby,’ daddy," she says. 

Niall rolls his eyes. "And that'd be you," he says to Louis. Louis just knocks his hand away from the stereo triumphantly. 

"Santa, honey, forgot to mention one little thing," he sings along in his best Madonna simper while Ellie squeals in the back seat, "a ring—" 

"—and I don't mean on the phone," Niall continues over him, like he can’t help it. Louis grins at him, and then his face softens, helplessly. It’s the season. He gets like this. 

"None of that," Niall warns him. But Louis just squeezes him on the knee, looking down, feeling his face flush a little. The simple silver band he's worn to match Niall's since bringing Ellie home three years ago gleams softly on his ring finger. Niall bites back a smile. 

"Again!" Ellie says, little hands balled into gleeful fists.

"Now, El, it's Christmas, that means you'll have to tolerate a little of your daddies' sappiness," Louis tells her seriously. She giggles and chucks a stuffed animal at him.

"Hey," Niall warns uselessly. 

"Well done," Louis says. "Is she old enough to know about coal in her stocking?" 

"Be my guest," Niall says, winking and turning up the volume on ‘Santa Baby,’ round two. They let Ellie sing this time because it's funny to hear her try to say the words "platinum mine," but by the end they're all singing together, harmonizing, even, and Louis honestly doesn't know how their little family is going to make it through the holiday when he's already feeling as sugar-sweet as this. 

 

(two years) 

Liam and Harry get them the best possible present the year Ellie’s just turned two: a tiny guitar to match Niall’s. Their plans for the rest of the day are immediately canceled. Niall already played her lullabies, but watching him teach her to play them back might be the best thing Louis has ever seen.

It’s the funny part about this – he gets so overwhelmed by things he’d never have thought he would. It’s hard to even understand how much he loves these people, this boy who isn’t such a boy anymore and this tiny little miracle of a girl they’ve been given. And everyone else, too, all the people around them watching it all happen. Maybe it’s just Christmas, bringing it out, but there it is. 

Niall plucks out the Bob Dylan “Christmas Song” on his guitar as Ellie watches attentively. She gets quiet sometimes, pensive, even, which Louis thinks she learned from him, but either way it’s adorable. 

“Should I be filming this?” he asks as Niall positions her little hands on the strings, puts a pick in her hand and shows her how to strum. 

“This is the best thing ever, Lou,” Niall says, looking up. He’s genuinely bursting with excitement, and Louis laughs. “We can get her lessons, and she’ll get so good, and, and—” he breaks off, laughing helplessly, breathless. 

“I ought to call Harry and Liam back over here to see this,” Louis says. “I think you like it more than she does.”

“We both like it as much as you can like anything,” Niall says. Ellie, of course, has turned back to ripping up stray pieces of wrapping paper and tossing them in the air when Niall turns back, though, which suits Niall just as well. 

“We spend hundreds on presents and she always likes the wrapping paper more,” Louis says, shaking his head. “You’d think we’d learn.” But he’s too brimming over with love for the words to come out any way other than fond. Niall chucks some wrapping paper at his feet. Ellie squeals and does the same with ribbon at his head.

“You are encouraging her,” Louis tells Niall sternly.

“Nah, she’s encouraging me, isn’t that right, El?”

She nods vigorously. “More, Dada,” she says, picking the guitar back up just like he showed her. Niall looks up at Louis with pure wonder on his face, and Louis feels his heart swelling, swelling, until it’s actually impossible for him not to get on the floor and sing with them. 

 

(fourteen months)

They’d started doing Christmas tea of sorts with Zayn and Perrie every year on Louis’ birthday long before they adopted Ellie, but she doesn’t change the tradition much. Niall just spends most of the afternoon on the floor with her instead of at the table with the adults. Zayn and Louis laugh down at him pulling faces, and Ellie’s laughing too, though they aren’t sure whether it’s because of Niall or just everyone else. 

She’s 14 months old now, getting big, and Niall has to hold onto her to keep her from toddling off at every turn. He tickles her, bounces her in his lap, plays with her hands. She points up at Louis and whispers to Niall, wanting to know what Louis is talking about, and Niall whispers back an elaborate, nonsensical analysis of the conversation. 

“When are fake Aunt and Uncle Perrie and Zayn going to make a fake cousin for El to play with, eh?” he asks at one point. Perrie nearly spits out her tea laughing. Louis rolls his eyes.

“Honestly, you’re like the mother-in-law,” he says to Niall. 

Niall shrugs. "If you'd rather she only have your sisters’ kids and the friends she makes when she goes to nursery school..." 

"Absolutely not," Louis says. "Dodgy fuckers, the lot of those daycare kids." Perrie laughs, scandalized, and Niall puts his hands over the baby's ears, grinning up at Louis. 

"She’ll live,” Zayn laughs. “Sure she hears worse from Niall at home.”

“That she does,” Niall says proudly. 

“Dada!” Ellie says, and when Niall and Louis both look around, she tries again, insistent. “Ni!” She has trouble with ‘Niall,’ but then, so do most people. 

Louis frowns at her. “It’s like that, is it?” She giggles. Niall flips her upside down in his lap to raucous squeals, looking gleeful. 

“You haven’t worked out what she’ll call you, then?” Zayn asks.

“It changes all the time,” Louis says. “I guess she’ll figure it out on her own?” 

“No pressure,” Zayn says, grinning. 

Niall is whispering something to Ellie on the floor. She clambers to her feet, swaying, and holds onto Niall’s shoulder for balance. 

“Da, happy birthday!” she shouts triumphantly. It sounds more like ‘bird day,’ but Niall looks immensely pleased with himself all the same, and so does Ellie. Louis feels his face light up beaming without even a thought. He leans down and kisses her wetly on the forehead. 

“Eww!” she giggles. 

“Thank you, love,” he says, nudging her nose with his. “Happy birthday to you, too.”

“Not mine, silly,” she tells him. 

“Oh, isn’t it?” He looks around at Niall, mock-confused. Niall shrugs, biting back a grin. She looks between the two of them. 

“Christmas!” she yells, stamping her foot delightedly. 

Louis smacks himself in the forehead. “Right! Of course. So smart, our El-Belle,” he says to her, tickling her sides until she collapses into Niall’s lap in giggles. 

“You three are adorable,” Perrie says with utter fondness, shaking her head as she watches the baby in Niall’s arms. “It’s unbelievable. What did you get her for Christmas?” 

"What did Santa get her, I think you mean,” Louis says, winking at Ellie, who isn’t paying a whit of attention. “And loads of toys and clothes and stuff, but last year she was more interested in the boxes than what was in them, so we'll see.” He looks down at Niall and Ellie facing each other, Niall cross-legged, blowing raspberries on Ellie’s arms. 

Zayn is smiling quietly when Louis next looks around. 

"You guys got lucky," he says. Perrie looks over at Zayn, a look much like Louis’ on her face. 

"Yeah," Louis sighs. He drinks some tea, and reaches down to refill Niall’s cup. "I know."

 

(two months)

Niall comes downstairs late on Christmas Eve, looking exhausted but happy. “She’s asleep,” he says. “Finally.” 

“Big day,” Louis yawns. Maybe a little too big for a two-month-old, but it’s his birthday, after all, and Ellie likes all the fuss, likes looking at the colored lights and the funny sweaters and the snow, which makes her jump when it lands on her skin, staring in wonder between it and them. “She okay?”

“I think so.” Niall flops down next to him on the couch. “God, I’m tired. Are we going to be this tired for the rest of our lives?”

“Afraid so,” Louis says gravely. “She’s never moving out, of course. We’ll be parenting when we’re sixty.” 

“Don’t say sixty,” Niall says, pulling a face.

“I’m the one who’s thirty-three today,” Louis grouses. 

Niall smiles sideways at him. “Oh, I forgot, is it your birthday? Gee, I haven’t gotten you anything, too bad.” 

Louis shoves him a little, grinning. 

“I think it’s a good age,” Niall says. “Nice repetition. Three’s a good number.”

Louis thinks of the baby asleep upstairs, Niall next to him, their little family. “It is,” he says softly. 

Niall looks at him. “Oh, don’t do that. Don’t get all mushy.”

“It’s just weird, you know, I feel like she should make me feel totally ancient, but in the end it’s her makes me feel youngest of all,” Louis says. “Isn’t that odd?”

Niall’s just smiling at him, all soft eyes and that familiar curve of his mouth that’s been there since they were teenagers, adoring and in love and perfect. Louis holds the gaze, feeling as quietly overwhelmed as he ever does by how lucky he is. Then Niall gets up and crosses to the stereo. 

Something slow and Christmassy comes on, piano and a quiet mezzo. Niall extends a hand.

"Do me the honor, birthday boy?"

Louis grins, raising an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Really." Niall gives his wrist a little flourish. "Could get down on one knee if you like."

"I don't think you do that to ask people to dance with you," Louis says, but he gets up and steps into Niall's space anyway, slips a hand around his waist and one over his shoulder. "Though I could think of some other reasons for you to get on your knees," he mutters into Niall's ear when they're flush together, feet moving in a random shuffle. 

Niall laughs, a breathy little shudder right up against Louis. "Stop it, we're being romantic." 

"Adulthood," Louis mutters ruefully. He glances compulsively at the baby monitor on the coffee table before Niall turns his face back in with a hand at his cheek.

“I promise she’s asleep," he murmurs against Louis' neck, and it's something about that that makes Louis go all to softness and warmth inside, makes all the nervous, tired angles of another birthday at their age fall away like tissue paper. 

They slow dance in an aimless pattern, drifting through the scraps of wrapping paper and ribbon strewn around the living room floor (that they let Ellie play with, highly supervised). 

"Are we really doing this?" Niall says softly after a while.

"What, this silly dancing?"

"No, this." Niall nods sideways to the toys and packages around the tree, the baby monitor humming softly with static. “Being – dads.” 

"We could take her back if you like," Louis says, chewing on his lip to keep from laughing. "Not too late."

Niall huffs a laugh into his neck. “You know what I mean.”

“I know,” Louis says. “I know. And… I just think we’re going to be fine.”

“Yeah,” Niall says. “No, I think we are. I think we’re amazing.” He slips a hand up the back of Louis’ shirt and just leaves it there, warm against his skin, asking for nothing. “I love seeing you as a dad,” he murmurs. “I love seeing you with her.” He presses a kiss up into the space beneath Louis' ear. 

Louis tugs him closer as they move on the spot, a hand at the small of his back, fingers creeping into the hair at the nape of his neck. "And you, too," he says, grinning in spite of himself. "Christmas and birthdays make me sappy, don’t they," he asks, pulling back to look at Niall.

Niall steers him into the back of the sofa and kisses him full on the mouth then, no warning, gets his tongue along Louis' lower lip and licks inward. Hands mussing up Louis' hair, pushing into him chest to chest. Niall's mouth tastes like cinnamon. Louis is out of breath when they break apart. 

"Romantic," he mutters, smirking.

"Shut up, it's my transition." Niall grins, and slips his hand down to Louis'. "Now come upstairs and I'll give you your present."

"Is it your dick in a box?" Louis snickers.

Niall winks roguishly over his shoulder and moves to lead Louis out of the living room. Louis remembers to grab the baby monitor off the table, though, before he follows.

 

On Christmas night Ellie falls asleep on Niall’s chest beside the tree, surrounded by wrapping paper and half played-with toys (she liked the paper best of all). Louis comes into the living room, fingers wrapped around a beer. 

“Mum called,” he murmurs. “We left a pacifier there this morning.”

“That’s okay,” Niall says without opening his eyes. “We’ve got more.”

Louis looks down at him.

“Reckon we’ve become right domestic, haven’t we,” Niall says softly. His body only moves a little beneath the sleeping baby when he talks. He’s good at that, keeping her still.

“Well,” Louis says, nodding to the baby before remembering Niall isn’t looking at him. “We should put her to bed,” he says instead. 

“Nah, comfortable here,” Niall says. He looks up then, smiling upside down at Louis. “Just come sleep,” he says. “Get the blanket.”

Louis smiles, but it actually hurts a little, this sudden feeling in his chest. Two months old and her first Christmas gone, and somehow he’s never felt younger, seeing her and Niall together, like they’ll be like this forever, like they have to be. Seeing how effortless Niall is as a dad, and how they’re making it work, one day at a time.

He tugs the blanket off the couch and curls up against Niall’s side on the floor, an arm over both of them, and falls asleep beneath the glow of the tree.


End file.
